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How To Stay Safe Within The BDSM Community

3 min read

As much as the BDSM community is made for trying out new things and letting yourself go as you divulge into the moment, safety is a number one priority, and you should never let your guard slip down. Navigating the world of BDSM online can be tricky if you are not used to it, so it pays to do a little research and make sure to always be vigilant. 

Before you get stuck into the roleplay and whip out the BSDM restraints, here are some key safety considerations to make to ensure you are having fun without compromising on your safety:

Keep your identity hidden

When you join a new online community, there’s no need to post a clear face picture, your phone number or a link to your social media profile. Interacting with an online BDSM community may feel safe and secure but you can never be sure who is out there, so it is best to preserve your anonymity. Pick a screen name that has does not give away your real name and withhold your personal information until you know it is safe to so do, avoiding the risk of phishing, blackmail, or those with bad intentions.

Stick to your boundaries

Before you get stuck in, set yourself some rules and make sure to stick to them, even in the heat of the moment. Whether you would be more comfortable to talk on the phone before meeting anyone in person or you’d rather meet them in a public place of your choosing in the first instance, a little bit of caution can go a long way. It’s pretty normal for people in the BDSM scene to meet their partners online but good communication is needed from the offset; they should be respectful of your boundaries and abide by them at all times, showing their respect to you as a person. 

Find likeminded partners

The world of BSDM is a big one and everyone has different levels which they are willing to experiment with. Some people like to play in ways that are dangerous, or which leave their partner vulnerable, but if this is out of your comfort zone, they are not the one for you. Make sure that the person you’re taking risks with is responsible, compassionate, and interested in your wellbeing and hold off until you’ve built trust, sticking to those rules that you set for yourself. If somebody is being pushy or harassing you online, do not tolerate rude or aggressive behaviour and report them, making the community a better place as well as removing yourself from a dangerous position.

Trust your gut

When it comes to first meeting someone in the real world, stay alert at all times. You may initially want to pick somewhere private so you can talk about BDSM in peace, but this is a bad idea and you are better choosing a public place where you know there’ll be plenty of other people. If you find that they have lied about anything or you get a bad feeling from someone when meeting in person, it’s best to get out of there sooner rather than later.

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